Brad Pitt

Nick explaining strategy to Jon..

Was shocked to hear that Brad left Angellina Jollywally. In addition it was a bigger blow to hear that Brad wants me to move to Cricklewood. I couldn't understand why he chose Cricklewood as I don't do cheap so rung him to explain that despite the fact that I was 'moved' by the gesture I could not possibly move to Crickelwood and would consider it if it was Hollywood. It annoyed me when he got John Gray to call me in the middle of the night from a House of commons number trying to persuade me to drop my objections. More annoying when Jackie Lewis and Katrina Hoogendooben also got involved. Jackie was doing her nails somewhere in soholand and interrupted her busy schedule to ring me. So I made it clear that it was a no go area. Brad then rung to offer me the chance do do Broadway but you can imagine how angry I got when I found out that he meant Ealing bloody Broadway! I was so furious I got in touch with UL supremo Marsha Jane who spend hours explaining that she did not want to get involved because she was busy doing her hair and politely passed me on to Jon of the Rogers. Now he did the usual thing and explained in Latin why I had to be pragmatic. He more or less stated that it was a delegatus non pote delegare kind of a situation and it was not his culpa and that whilst we were all Pares inter pares some of us were more pares than others. Its all Greek to me to be honest! It all made sense when I saw him taking a recyclying box full of wine bottles outside his front door for collection with Chris Remington and Stuart Barber bringing out 2 other boxes and Linda screaming in the backround demanding a rule I investigation. So I gave in and will not be running off to meet Brad or doing any supervisions. I shall instead keep away from all this and stay gorgeous! I am sure Andrew of the many Berrys will be relived with this!